Shortly after we first moved here, we were down at Judy and Shannon's (mother and father-in-law) house for dinner and afterward Shannon offered to drive me and Brennan home on the gator. SO, he dropped us off on our front porch and something caught my eye...A SNAKE. Coiled around the little awning-holder-upper-metal-post-thingy. Well, you can just ask my father-in-law how THAT went because I don't care to relive it. He rescued us and handled the snake appropriately. Thank God...because as you can imagine, the snake obviously almost ATE my infant child.*
All I can say is, (again) Thank God my father-in-law was the one to stumble upon the nearly 6-foot-long snake that was in our chicken house the other day. I think it is safe to assume that if it had been me that discovered the snake, there would be a big mess to clean up as I may have soiled myself. Seriously...why do snakes even exist? They're just so...creepy! Ugh. (No offense to all of you "keep snakes as pets" folks...but you clearly suffered some sort of trauma as a child and were not loved by your Mother.**)
Shannon killed the slippery serpent and I was left to assume that all was right in the world once more and that I no longer needed to be concerned with our egg-thieving pest. WRONG. Today my daring brute of a husband killed ANOTHER snake in the chicken house. Snakes on a Mother-F'in Farm.***
The curses of living in the middle of a hay field...
*Obviously a gross exaggeration.
**Only joking. But seriously.
***Sorry...I'm aware it is crass. However...it's a slightly modified (and highly ridiculous) movie line from the atrocious movie "Snakes on a Plane" and oh-so-appropriate in this instance.
No comments:
Post a Comment